Sunday, April 25, 2010

The Case of a Dreamer

This place I stay in, is like the whole world
To me the whole world…is just like this place
This world seems a beautiful place because you are here with me
It is your presence which makes this place beautiful…
As usual I was dreaming about me and you again...
all alone…
in this desolate place…
with no other person nearby to trace
left to wonder where you had gone…!
There are times when I just want to take your hand and feel its warmth
There are times when I want to see the sparkle in your eyes all day long
There have been times when I want to hold you tight in my arms knowing that this is what brings calm to my mind
You look at me with an unusual sparkle in your eyes
The smile you give subdues a thousand cries…
It is not that I am crazy, a raving lunatic or a stalker of some kind
It’s just that I am a dreamer and these things keep me happy so I would rather dream on…if you don’t mind!

Heal


Heal what is broken
Speak what remains unspoken
Don't carry it along with you it’s nothing but a burden
If not now it will break you later, that’s for certain!
It's only once that you can do this
Take the chance don’t give it a miss…
If you don't take a step now
You won't ever get the courage to do so anyhow!




(Something I had penned down long back in Panchgani)

Saturday, April 24, 2010

A Discussion to End All Discussions

“The coach refuses to play with a team who is least bothered to play on the field and instead indulges oneself in things all else- politics, mind games and the rest: sabotaging a long drawn methodical process and ruining it all.”

The man known to be a one man army tough nut seemed lost and disoriented as he left the room…leaving his players to deal with deafening silence!
The shock…
The silence…
And then a familiar sight…
The whispers grew louder, the silence was replaced with loud talks and there were murmurs no more; groups formed out of thin air and the blame game began…
The players screwed up for the umpteenth time and finally the coach walked out…cutting a sorry figure…deprived of hope…he gave up on us!
It seemed to be a scene out of a movie…except that this wasn’t one….this was happening for real!
The fault lay with no one but us alone!
We screwed up and it was time to pay a price!
Our seniors did this before us…but the great ones that we are…we followed their footsteps and made the same mistake…it was like we shot ourselves with our own gun!
Some of you who read this…might think that the blame game, this note and all the goody goody looking things in it are all expected- just a way of passing off the guilt from within…taking it all out of the system to make space for new guilt to fill in….but…
that’s far from the truth…
in fact nowhere near it.
Getting into the discussion would unnecessarily be like adding salt to injury but not mentioning that this has happened three times before would be a crime!
Each time it happens…we stay as silent as idols and then the next day it is back to square one!
Nothing seems to affect this thick little skull of ours and that is a sad issue…a fault we might find useful to overcome!
The blame is always put on the “back- benchers”, the seniors and the strictness of the faculty but what about us as individuals?
Are we, each one of us not to blame….why is it that one particular member is scrutinized while the rest are scot free when the whole team has failed as a bunch! why is it that the batch cannot take collective blame?
Against the coach or the other staff…we feel content in winning smaller battles when at the same point the whole war is being lost!
We fail to realize a very simple fact…the coach and the team members are of the same team! No one gains from losing out on some project or internship.
I sit, in the corridor and listen; spying on peoples’ after thoughts of the coach’s walkout and all of the talk of “improving” etc. seems so fickle and fake!
They say one thing one day...something new the next and yet we return to square one the very next day! The gravity of the whole situation is somehow lost on us and that is what is the most saddening or if I may use…scary!
On a more personal note…as I sit there the entire gamut of emotions wash over me- acute sense of anger, sadness, grave disappointment but the one that rules over it all is the sense of fear!
At the end of the day we seem to ignore the fact that through our own follies we are losing out on an amazing coach and by deriding what the coach says it is not him but us who suffer! It is not he who needs us but something quite the other way around!
We just don’t seem to create a bond that, if not a lifetime long one, seems to fail surviving even the two years that follow! That is how badly we have screwed up,
Today I guess we lose a man who has done so much for us but still resigns because of our own histrionics! We just fail to appreciate what he has done for us!
And it looks like this time we are going to pay real bad!

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Secret Eye

Those large quizzical eyes were looking for something familiar
They searched for comfort and a whole lot more
They sparkled and gleamed but not out of fear or anger but of pure joy of being here....
I didnt look her way at all in shyness that my true feelings would be discovered
I felt like it should stay hidden but it was also somethin i treasured
And then the moment came when our eyes finally did meet
My heart fluttered and my body shivered
Everything slowed down
Time stopped.....
I got caught....
My heart was pounding against my ribs i feared tht it would be heard by
that loony standing a mile away.....
Locked for long our eyes said a lot more than our tongues ever could
The playfulness the craziness the happiness the madness i could see everything
in those eyes
They were as clear as crystal...as pure as the rain from the skies
The more i looked into the depths of those eyes the more at peace i felt
I was transported to a world where you and i were alone
Where nothing but our love existed
A place where your aura was what lit the place up
A place where you were happy and so was i
This is when a realization struck me.....
In you my perfect match i had found........

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Plug It Out

You try to hide it,
You try to struggle through it,
You try to brave it out
You try to steer clear of it
But that don’t work either
Isn’t there a way to get it over with?
You try and try and try some more
But nothing seems to be working out anymore
How do you get rid of it?
Can you ignore it?
They seem to be jabbering on and on and on giving no breaks or any respite
The monotony of it all drains your will of putting up a fight!
Trying to make sense out of it is an option no more
A 40 minute barrier between you and the door
The wait seems like a lifetime times 4.
The mind seems sluggish, the body is sore
My eyelids are heavy; energy’s sucked out of my body till the last of its pore.
Half the class is snoring while the other half wants to shout out loud...BORING!!
The only answer I seem to find till this torture ends is plugging myself out from all things boring and super slow
Maybe..
Tune myself into a world where I haven't been before!
I figure it's time to put the music on full blast and journey through the realms of the unknown!!!!

Saturday, April 10, 2010

One Big Live Performance

Leaving Home: A Documentary on Indian Ocean

Writer/Director- Jaideep Varma
Genre: Documentary
Duration: 1 hr. 55 mins.

“Close your eyes, let your feet tap and your hands clap as you savor some of Indian Oceans’ most entertaining and yet comforting numbers.”
This in all its essence is Leaving Home, where it is not a particular scene that touches the heart but a particular cord struck by the band members that leaves you awestruck!
I have seen documentaries on bands, quite a few of them, so when I went into the hall to watch Jaideep Varma’s “Leaving Home” I thought I knew what to expect. But the 1st thought that entered my mind as I left the hall was, “Wow, this was something refreshingly different. It was like getting to see one big live performance from India’s 1st rock band that now I have come to love!”
The music in the film, from the 5 albums that they have released has such a different feel to it. Be it Maa Rewa for the Narmada Bachao Andolan, Desert Rain, Kandisa or even Jhini, their music is both soothing to the ears as well as passionate and energetic.
The film introduces us to each of the band members- Susmit Sen, (late) Asheem Chakravarty, Rahul Ram and Amit Kilam and each of them moves the audience through the initial baby stages of the band- the obstacles, the sacrifices, the constant change in members, their music, their determination and finally their success!
They go on to tell us the changes that they have had to make in their lives because of the formation of Indian Ocean, but they have no regrets and are glad that the band was able to achieve the success that it has.
What I liked about this film is the way they present it- the film is shown in portions, according to the albums that they have released plus the movie that they have performed in as well as taking extensive interviews of the band members themselves along with snippets of famous personalities from the music industry speaking about Indian Ocean.
The movie captures the whole journey of an artist- from the struggle at the grassroots’ level to the pinnacle of success. We even get to see the different characteristics of each of the members’ in the group- the calm demeanor of Susmit, the craziness of Amit, the passion of Asheem and the jolly nature of Raghu Ram. The best part of the film is when Amit confesses that Indian Ocean does not have a wolf leading the pack; they are all leaders in their own right and end up giving their best when playing as a group.
The four of them seemed so well synchronized as a group, it almost feels as if they were born to become a band. They obviously suffered a big loss with the passing away of Asheem Chakravarty but instead of being bogged down, the passion he had instilled in the group seems to have become much stronger than before. And that is what one needs to keep the music flowing.
This is one documentary that I would advise you not to miss!